I am sole careperson to husband. Hired home help , but getting to rough to care for him most other days. Assisted living with added help or nursing home. Which I don't like that just yet. His sons live far . so no help. And honestly they said nursing home if they take him. I have family in another state so I won't go with him. Or live in aA.L home. Not ready.2nd marriage late in life has lots of issues.Feeling lost and alone.
It's certainly not the way either of us intended to spend our last years together. But it is what it is, and at least we have this. You could too.
My stepsons also say that when I can no longer manage my husband's care, that he will have to go to a nursing home. They are not prepared to take care of him.
I keep doing it as long as I can, because I can't bear to be separated from him. But, it is getting harder and harder, and one day I will have to make the decision. I will place him in a nursing home and begin to navigate life on my own, without my dear, sweet husband by my side. I'm sure I will feel lost and alone and sad. It's the same with losing a partner to death. We suddenly have to face life without them. And it happens to all of us sooner or later.
Eventually, the cost of in-home care will exceed the amount of a facility. And, you yourself are not ready, so please make the most of your own life now, make yourself a priority.
You will need to work out your own future care: PoA, advance healthcare directive, which facility (if any), and where you wish to live this out.